Hammer and Sick
by LadyZotalot
Summary: Robin invites a sick friend into the Batcave.


Robin ignored the mighty sneeze which echoed throughout the cave as he dragged the well-built blonde man to the medical bay. "God bless you," he murmured. Robin handed his patient a box of tissues.

"I do not requi-" Thor sneezed again. He took a handful of Kleenex. "You have my gratitude," he corrected.

"No problem." Robin motioned for Thor to take a seat on the bunk. "You said you're Thor. Like the Norse god?"

Thor nodded, more or less; since he sneezed again at the same time, Robin wasn't sure if his sudden jerk was a yes or a plea for NyQuil. "So, I'm going to be honest..." Robin began digging through a drawer for something that could fit the god. "I really don't know much about Norse mythology. There's Vikings, elves, werewolves, and then Loki has a horse baby. Is that all I need to know?"

Thor nodded and/or sneezed again.

Robin smiled. "Okay, good. Glad I'm not missing anything." He handed Thor a pair of sweatpants and XXXLarge Superman merch top. "This is the biggest stuff we've got down here. Batman will get you something better once he responds to my signal..." Robin glanced at his wrist and brought up a clock face. "He should be here by now."

Thor took the offered Superman shirt but suddenly sound himself using it as a large handkerchief. "I did not mean-"

"It's okay," Robin dismissed his worries, "in fact, I'm sure I can tell Superboy about this. It might cheer him up." Robin pulled a collapsible arm from his belt and clawed the shirt with it. He tossed it into the Bat trash-bin which he'd gotten Bruce for Father's Day. "And he said my gift was impractical," Robin muttered. "Anyways, I think we need to get to the point now." The teen motioned for Thor to take off his flowing cape.

Thor began removing his clothes as Robin found another wearable shirt for him. "Do not worry, young friend. My comrades will soon divine my whereto-bouts. I will be an albatross to your hospitality no longer."

Robin frowned. "I think you should repeat that unless you really were saying we're on a boat in the Soviet Union."

Thor sneezed again.

Robin nodded. "Ah! I see. Thank you for clearing up the matter." He collected Thor's dirty cape, helmet, tops, and boots. "You mean to say you're from another universe and your team will send you back momentarily...I can work with that. So, what were you fighting before? Why are you so sick?"

Thor, for variety, coughed this time. "My compatriots and I were on the field of battle with one most fiercest."

"You were taking on Tyra Banks?" Dick whistled. "You've got balls, man. But," Robin pointed to Thor's hammer, "I could already tell that."

Thor began removing his belt so that he could put on the new shirt. "I do not understand your meaning..." Thor was not sure what such a young warrior could mean by these statements.

"I meant your hammer. I couldn't help but notice that it's very large." Robin smirked. "Maybe you're compensating for something?" While Thor pulled the shirt over his head, Robin reached for the hammer in question and tested out its weight in his hands. "Huh, this thing isn't as heavy as it looks."

Thor's head popped out through the shirt's collar. He looked to his empty belt and then to Robin and the gleaming weapon in his small paws. "You...shouldn't be able to do that."

Robin quirked a brow. "Do what? You mean this?" He tossed the hammer into the air behind him, did a back-spring, and caught Thor's weapon before it touched the ground. "Ta da!" Robin took a bow. "Thank you, thank you." He glanced at Thor's hammer. He puppeteered the hammer taking its own bow as well.

Thor wasn't sure how to respond. After a long chain of sneezes, he settled on applause. "Can I have my hammer back, please?"

* * *

><p><strong><em>Meanwhile at the Avengers Mansion<em>**

Batman took the tissue Dr. Pym handed to him while the scientist continued explaining, "This influenza phenomena is amazing. The introduction to universes so similar and yet so different on the microscopic level has completely shorted out your autoimmune system!"

Jan shook her head. "Isn't Thor's return more important, Hank? I think you should work on getting Batman returned his his Earth instead of...whatever it is that you're doing."

Spider-Man crawled down from the ceiling. "But the science, Jan!" he pleaded.

Bruce Banner nodded in agreement. "Science, Jan. Batman has to stay longer."

Jan turned to Batman. "Are you okay with that?"

Batman sneezed and/or nodded.

"That was a yes!" hollered Hank. "No take backs."


End file.
